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Blog 18: What Went Wrong to Create #MyCareerSuicide?

Updated: Jul 4

[from the #MyCareerSuicide Series Part 2]



Are you ready to start your career but fear the potential pitfalls?

No need to fret! In this blog post, we will share the exact mistake that will manifest a definite pitfall in your career, i.e., #MyCareerSuicide.

Welcome, everybody! My name is Ray Rogers, and I am the senior content writer at The R-N-R Hour. We are now in the second part of our latest series, #MyCareerSuicide. In the previous blog post, I mentioned how this new series is your chance to learn and avoid making the same mistakes I made early in my career. Well, you will not know how to avoid my mistakes that manifested #MyCareerSuicide if you do not know how and why I made the mistakes in the first place. This part in the series will be the longest but is most informative in understanding the purpose of #MyCareerSuicide. Nevertheless, I hope everyone enjoys the content thus far so let us begin the blog post.

My Story

My journey began at the age of 12. As an unapologetic daydreamer, I would occasionally fantasize about the infinite possibilities for a future profession. Like any other kid, I was not really sure about my exact direction in life but, I knew for sure that I wanted to do something beneficial for mankind. The uncertainty in my life’s direction all changed when I started watching Bill Nye the Science Guy (my favorite American television show as a child and teenager). The elaborate demonstrations with scientific experiments and thorough explanations of every great scientific contribution to contemporary society made me instantly fall in love with science’s applications and theories.

With haste, I set my aspirations to become a scientist at a premier research university. I would specifically daydream about doing cancer research and developing cures at the University of Michigan (my favorite college football team at the time). At the age of 14, I decided to manifest my dreams through extensive preparation. I would spend countless days inside my room: planning each step to eventually achieve my goal; learning more about biology, chemistry, and physics; and finding mentors in the field of research and development for possible internship and research opportunities. For the most part, my investment paid off. I was able to breeze through high school and attend a rather good university. In four years, I did work extremely hard to obtain my Bachelor of Science Degree in Biology. I was also offered opportunities to work on several research projects in prominent undergraduate laboratories.

When it was time for my graduation, I was offered a postbaccalaureate research position at a premier national research institution. Ladies and gentlemen, I could not emphasize how excited I was to obtain this position because this opportunity was a position that could assist me in obtaining entrance into a Ph.D. program. Here my friends is where my career began. It was June 2011 and at this position, I spent countless hours in the laboratory. I was giving it my all but my hard work and determination did not pay off. I had a difficult time with properly executing the standard operating procedures for my research project and, to make things worse, I was not getting along with my principal investigator, coworkers, and peers. As time progressed, I began to not feel confident in my ability to properly execute my job responsibilities and provide value to the team. Unfortunately, I did not get along with anyone because I did not know how to emotionally connect with everyone. My job performance was sadly dwindling and that was the least of problems. Now, ladies and gentlemen let me share the mistake I made that created #MyCareerSuicide.

The Lesson

I cannot emphasize enough my level of disappointment and shame in my mistake, but I know it will serve as a great lesson to empower those who are willing to listen. To get straight to the point, my mistake was not being able to control my emotions in times of strife and defeat. You are probably thinking to yourself. Ray, are you serious right now? Yes, my friends and here is why controlling your emotions is essential to the beginning of your career. There was a day in the lab when my supervisor disrupted my experiment and in front of everyone brutally criticized me. He basically shouted his discontent in my inability to obtain favorable results to progress the lab’s research project. In addition, he repeatedly asked me why I could not get the experiment right with the angriest look in his eyes. In the worst response to this situation, I became teary eye and avoided answering his question. If I remember right, I then immediately exited the building without informing the principal investigator or completing my portion of the work for that operational day.

Yes, that was the lowest point in my career. I really did allow my emotions to get the best of me (*Hint* the exact mistake). However, I am a reasonable man and understand that emotions are necessary for a successful existence of a human being, but they can be a detriment to that same individual if not properly applied in certain scenarios. There is currently no scientific consensus on the definition, however, emotions can be described as psychological states brought on by neurophysiological changes via thoughts, feelings, behavioral responses, and a degree of pleasure or displeasure. I want you all to remember this statement. Feelings are here today and gone tomorrow just like how a bad day can next day lead to your best day.

So, why is the inability to control your emotions a huge mistake for your career? Because it demonstrates a lack of mental fortitude and social competence. My performance did dwindle because I did not have the foresight to know that a positive attitude and consistent work ethic would lead to a turnaround or in my case an eventual success in my experiments and relationship with coworkers. My poor emotional reaction drew the continual ire of my coworkers and management. Sadly, I experienced consistent persecution and miscommunication.

Your next question probably is, Ray, why did you not know how to control your emotions? Well, the answer is in the story I shared earlier my friend. When I look back, I spent a majority of my teenage and early 20’s preparing to become a research scientist. I mean seriously I sacrificed a lot of free time I could have spent socializing with peers. This decision led to a demise in my inability to control my emotions. Since I did not have a plethora of social interactions in my teenage and college years, I did not have the experience to emotionally deal with negative social interactions. Therefore, every young adult or teenager who is reading this blog post please take the time before the beginning of your career and develop your communication skills. I promise you it will save you the pain of learning the hard way like me.

Lastly, I want to emphasize my final point. By staying calm, cool, and collected, these traits will serve as a bridge to future success and abundance in your career. I did not stay calm, cool, and collected with my emotions. This was the mistake that created #MyCareerSuicide. I hope everyone can see how my career suicide manifested as a young professional.

Conclusion

I hope everyone enjoyed this post. It emotionally took a lot for me after nearly a decade to reflect on this experience and then open up about it, but I hope it serves as a lesson for everyone else to secure an abundant, promising future early in their career. Before I go, you might be wondering if I simply made a bad decision as a young person and might be exaggerating this entire situation. Well, there is still more to my story. My bad decision created a hole I could not pull myself out of regarding my career, but I will give you all more details in Part 3 about an eventual #MyCareerSuicide.

If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to email us at thernrhour@gmail.com for clarifications. Finally, I look forward to seeing you all on July 31st, 2021, for Part 3 in the #MyCareerSuicide series titled Blog 19: Is It Truly the Case We Get What We Deserve?


Sincerely,

The R-N-R Hour™

© 2021


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